It’s been a tough few months for the man The Sydney Morning Herald’s P P McGuiness astutely, and without overstatement, labelled “the most recent victim of the lynch mob mentality rife in Australian public debate”.
As I wait for Professor David Flint at Posh, the restaurant for mainstream Australians who can afford it, I speculate that the worst ignominy this intellectual heavyweight, and, without being too adolescent about it, total spunk for his age, has suffered is interrogation at a Senate hearing by that socialist in a bad suit, John “Blue-Baiter” Faulkner.
Bearing Paddy’s point about “lynch mobs” in mind, dinkum Aussies should know that if the Australian Labor Party (ALP) snatches power again, we’ll become a polity where our best columnists metaphorically, and possibly literally, will be forced to wear a giant letter identifying their conservatism.
Yes, a Labor victory will see Andrew Bolt compelled to adorn a big “C” to categorise himself.
Exemplifying the brutality we’ll reside under is the unfounded accusation that I’m a “right-wing apologist for the Bush Administration” because of my measured piece, America: Saviour of Civilisation or Rescuer of the World?
As for the chap I’m about to chew the fat with, his acclaimed analysis of the influence of the chattering class, The Twilight of the Elites, will ensure he’s banished to the ALP’s version of a Gulag, an Australian Council of Trade Unions (ACTU) forum about the need for unfair dismissal laws to apply to small business.
Although my mobile telephone reception is dreadful in the City, I can discern Alan’s agreement with my conjecture about the Professor before the line dies. I reflect sadly, and informatively, to everyone in the quaint café, “if only I’d switched to Telstra, as they currently offer a Nokia for nothing on a $25 plan for two years.
“As the advertisement says”, I add with feeling, “great coverage so you can be truly mobile”.
Instead of hearing Jones, a broadcaster whose “perspicacity and integrity” (Flint paraphrased Price 2004) has been acknowledged, I ascertain only the incessant hiss of hot air coming from the kitchen and a deep voice emanating from table six where John Laws is holding court; entertaining his new Australian Broadcasting Corporation (ABC) mates, no doubt.
Wait until they start insisting you watch their station rather than just appearing on it, Laws, and you’ll see that tuning in is enough to establish its, and your, bias.
An episode of Sesame Street about the number 7 and the letter L (for left-wing and lesbian, I suspect), could have been made by incendiary film-maker Michael Moore and Karl Marx, due to its emphasis on learning about people from different places and sharing with everybody.
Unable to telephone the Prime Minister to suggest Richard Alston as the next Chair of the Australian Broadcasting Authority (ABA), I pass more time nibbling on nuts and trying to recall the last time I saw “Dave”.
Was it at the ABA hearing into whether I gave favourable reviews to a number of eateries in several, well, all, of my radio editorials in return for free food or was it at that Liberal Party meeting when I seconded his motion that we go low-brow like the ALP and swap our usual soirée for a barbecue and a raffle?
Wherever it was, I was pleased to attend both with epistles ensconced in my handbag from the good Professor praising my insight and honesty. By the way, I was cleared on a legal technicality, the sausages were spiffing and I won the trip to Europe.
Unfortunately, problems with my (Optus) mobile rendered Flinty unable to reach me with the news he’s headed back to the Senate, so our interview will have to be postponed, probably until after the election when there’ll be plenty to gloat about.
Luckily for me, however, dishy Dr Brendan Nelson just walked in the door with a motorcycle helmet, a copy of his education reforms and the look of a politician who hasn’t got much media lately.
Don’t forget to visit Darlene’s website…contrary to rumours she doesn’t bite.